Private Life
 

The nature of the human is that he lives a public and a private life. In public life he lives with members of society in his tribe, village or city. In his private life he lives at home and among his family members. For his private life, Islam introduced specific rules to treat the problems that the human encounters, male or female. One of the main rules that Islam brought is that the private life is exclusively under the control of that human. It forbade anyone to enter his house without his permission. Allah (swt) says:

''Oh you who believe enter not homes other than yours until you establish familiarisation and greet their inhabitants. This is better for you, so that you might remember''. [An- Nur: 27]

In this Ayah, Allah (swt) commanded people not to enter homes without being permitted to. He (swt) considered not seeking the permission as estrangement and seeking it as familiarisation. He (swt) said:

''Until you establish familiarisation''. [An- Nur: 27]

This is metaphoric for seeking the permission, for familiarisation will not occur without it, i.e. until you seek the permission of its people. At-Tabarani reported that the Messenger said: ''Whoever peeps at a home without the permission of its people, it is as if he destroyed it''. Abu Dawood reported, a man asked the Prophet , about whether he should seek permission from his mother (when he enter her quarters) He said: ''Yes''. He said: “There is no one to serve her but me. Should I seek permission every time I enter?” He said: ''Do you like to see your mother naked?'' The man said: “No”. He said ''Then seek permission''. Therefore, Islam forbade any human from entering a home other than his without the permission of the home’s inhabitants. There is no difference whether the home to be entered upon is of a Muslim or not. This is due to the fact that while the speech is for Muslims, regarding seeking permission, the speech regarding the home came in an indefinite form (Mutlaqah) without any restriction (Taqyeed), and in a general form  without any specification (Takhsees). Therefore, this includes every home. This clearly indicates the sanctity of the home, and that the private life has specific rules such as seeking permission to enter someone’s home. In the case where the one seeking to enter doesn’t find anyone at home they are not to enter until permission is granted. And if they are told to turn back then they must turn back and are not allowed to enter.

Allah (swt) said:

''And if you find no one in, then do not enter until you are permitted. And if it is said to you to return, then return. That is better for you and Allah is knowledgeable of all that you do''. 
[An- Nur: 28]

This means that you are not to persist in seeking permission, or in seeking to ease the barrier (Hijab) nor to stand by the door waiting. All these rules apply in the case of the residential houses. As for the houses which are not inhabited, they have to be examined. If the person who wants to enter has possessions inside, then he can enter without seeking permission, and their homes are excluded from the houses that require the seeking of permission before entering. Allah (swt) says:

''It is no fault on your part to enter houses not used for living, in which you have some possessions. And Allah has knowledge of what you reveal and what you conceal''. 
[An- Nur: 29] 

The opposite meaning is that if you have no possessions there you are not to enter. So the exclusion is for the unoccupied house which contains possessions of the person who wants to enter. By these rules of seeking permission, the private life is protected against the inconvenience of those who knock on the door. Thus those who live inside would be able to enjoy peace, free of the interruption of the outsiders.

The above rules apply to free adults. As for the slaves and the children below the age of puberty, they may enter houses without seeking permission. However, three times of the day are made exceptions. These times are before the prayer of Fajr, at noon, and after the Salah of Ishaa (night prayer). In these three times, they must seek permission, for at such times people change their clothes to go to sleep or to wake up, thus revealing their ‘awrah. As for the time prior to Fajr Salah, it is the time to wake up from sleep and when people change from their sleeping clothes. Around noontime, is a rest and naptime. At this time people also change their clothes. As for after the prayer of Ishaa, it is a time of sleep and people change their day clothes for their sleeping attire. Other than these times, slaves and children under the age of puberty need not seek permission to enter. They may enter the houses at any other times they wish without permission. Once children reach the age of puberty, they lose their privilege to enter. They become like everyone else. Allah (swt) said:

''Oh you who believe at three times of day let those whom you possess as well as those from among you who have not yet attained puberty, ask permission from you (before intruding upon your privacy): before the prayer of daybreak, and whenever you lay aside your garments in the middle of the day, and after the prayer of nightfall: the three occasions on which your nakedness is likely to be bared. Beyond these (occasions) neither you nor they will incur any sin if they move (freely) about you, attending to (the needs of) one another. In this way Allah makes clear unto you His messages: for Allah is all knowing and wise!''. [An- Nur: 58]

These are the rules to protect the private life at home against outsiders who wish to enter with no difference between a person whom the woman can marry (Ajnabi) or a close person whom she cannot marry (Mahram) or in-law. In this private life, the woman lives with women or her mahram men, since they are the ones whom she can show the places of charm of her body, which she naturally shows in her private life. Other than women and her Mahram men, the woman may not live with anyone because she is not allowed to show before them the places of her body which are usually apparent when she carries out her home duties, further to the face and hands. So private life is restricted to women and mahram men. There is no difference between Muslim or non-Muslim women. They are all women. The fact that women are commanded not to show the places for charm of her body to people whom she can marry and the fact that she is allowed to show them to her mahrams, are a clear evidence that private life is restricted to the mahram alone. Allah (swt) said:

''And tell the believing women to lower their gaze, protect their private parts and not to show their places of charm in public beyond what may (decently) be apparent thereof; hence let them draw their head-coverings (khumur) over their necks and bosoms (juyub). And let them not display (more of) their charms to any but their husbands, their fathers, their husbands fathers, their sons, their husbands sons, their brothers, their brothers sons, their sisters sons, their women folk, their concubines, such male attendants as are beyond all sexual desire, or children that are as yet unaware of women’s nakedness; ''. [An- Nur: 31]

Falling under the same rules of the mahram men are the slaves they own, and those men who have no desire in women such as the elderly, insane,  and the like. Such people may be present in the private life. Other than them, i.e. non-mahram men, even if they were relations, they are not allowed at all to be in the private life. This is because the woman is not allowed to show before them the places of her body, which usually appear at home.

Thus, it is definitely haram for non-mahram men to meet women in private life. Exceptions are only those which the legislator defined such as for food and visiting the close relatives (Rahm). Such exceptions, however, are allowed only if the woman is accompanied by a Mahram man and has her entire awrah covered.


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