Maintaining Good Relations with Kith and Kin (Silat - ur - Rahm)
 

When Allah (swt) forbade the tribalism of Jahiliyah He only forbade that tribalism should be the bond between the sons of the Ummah, and He forbade that it controls the relationships amongst the Muslims. However, He ordered people to maintain contact with relatives and show kindness to them. It has been reported that a man asked the Prophet : ''who shall I show kindness to?'' He said: ''Your mother, father, sister and brother''. In another version: ''And your (Mawla) relation who is closer to you, as a right and duty and a tie of relationship (Rahm) which you should be kind to''. Asma bint Abu Bakr said: ''My mother who was a pagan, came to see me during the period of the treaty between the Muslims and Quraish. I went to seek the advice of the Prophet saying: ‘My mother has arrived and she is hoping (for my favour)''. The Prophet said: ''Yes, be good to your mother''.

Islam has divided the relations into two; firstly the relations from whom it is possible to inherit when they die. And secondly the relatives from the maternal side (Ulu al-arham). As for the ones who have the right to inherit they are the ones entitled to a statutory portion of inheritance (Ashab al-furud) and the agnate relations (relatives on the paternal side) (Asabat). As for relatives on the mothers side (Ulu al-arham) they are different from the former; they are the ones who have no share in inheritance nor are they from the agnate relations. They include ten categories: The maternal uncle (Khal) and aunt (Khala), maternal grandfather (Jadd li al-umm), son of the daughter and son of the sister, daughter of the brother, daughter of the paternal uncle and paternal aunt, and the half paternal uncle, son of the half brother and whoever declares to be one of them. Allah (swt) did not give those people any share in the inheritance of the person nor is their maintenance an obligation on the person. However Allah (swt) ordered the maintaining of good relations and being kind to all the relatives. Jabir (ra) narrated that the Prophet said: ''If any one of you is poor let him start with himself and if any one of you has surplus (wealth) let him spend on his family, and if any of you has further surplus let him spend it on his relatives''. Narrated Abu Ayyub: A man said to the Prophet ''Tell me of such a deed as will make me enter Paradise ''. The people said, ''What is the matter with him? What is the matter with him?'' The Prophet said, ''He has something to ask''. The Prophet said: ''(In order to enter Paradise) you should worship Allah and do not ascribe any partners to Him, offer prayer perfectly, pay the Zakat and keep good relations with your Kith and kin''. Thus, he ordered the keeping of good relations. It may be asked are the ones intended the relatives on the mothers side only, or does keeping good relations include all the relatives whether they are relatives from the unmarriageable degrees (Mahram), a non-mahram from the Asaba (relations on the paternal side/agnates) or the relatives from the maternal side. There exist a number of hadith concerning the keeping of good relations (Silat ar-rahm). He said: ''The one who severes ties with the relations will not enter Paradise''. It was narrated by Anas b. Malik that the Messenger of Allah said: ''Whoever loves that he be granted more wealth, and that his lease of life be prolonged, then he should keep good relations with his kith and kin''. It is narrated by Abu Hurayra that the Prophet said: ''Allah created His creation, and when He finished it, the womb got up and said, I seek refuge with you from Al-qatia (ties being severed with me)''. On that Allah (swt) said: ''Don't you accept that I bestow my favours on him who keeps your ties, and withhold My favours from him who severes your ties?'' On that it said, ''Yes, Oh my Lord!'' Then Allah (swt) said: ''That is for you''. Then the Messenger of Allah said: ''If you wish, you can recite:

''Would you then if you were given authority, do mischief in the land and sever your ties of kinship?'' [Muhammmad: 22]

He said: ''The Al-wasil (the one who keeps good ties with kith and kin) is not the one who recompenses the good done to him by his relatives, but Al-wasil is the one who keeps good relations with those relatives who had severed the bond of kinship with him''. All of this indicates the exhortation to keep good relations with kith and kin.

The Silat ar-rahm (keeping good relations) indicates the importance of what Allah (swt) has legislated regarding the keeping of good and friendly relations within the Islamic community, in the maintaining of good relations and co-operation between relatives, and the extent of the Shari'ah concern to organise the meeting of men and women and organise what results from this meeting in terms of the relationships (Alaqat) and whatever branches out from it. Hence the Islamic Shar'a through the rules which it legislated for the social aspect in the society provides the best social system for mankind.

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